Monday, February 13, 2012 at 12:33PM tagged Abraham Lincoln, movie, vampires 
If you've ever wondered about anything being historically accurate, then Lincoln fighting vampires is basically spot on. It's something that not a lot of people know about the old chap. Here's the trailer for the upcoming movie that exposes the dark underworld that he so heroically fought.
(so excited.)
Have you ever felt like the zombie genre was getting stale? Sure, the love of the zombie is like a national pass-time in the country. We all get together and talk various ways in which we would kill them, outrun them, basically overjoyus in our empowerment towards the demonic fodder.
But in these trying times of zombie culture, if America were to be bummed out by the oversaturation of it all. Then what better way to get excited for it all over again, by Killing the one man we've been trying to kill for years, BUT ALL OVER AGAIN?
Tuesday, February 7, 2012 at 1:52PM tagged Spiderman 4, The Amazing Spiderman, sarcasm, trailer 
It's a bit late to post it up considering every other publication out there got their hands on it at the stroke of midnight, but the new trailer for the next Spiderman movie has arrived.
It's basically Spiderman 4 to everybody, but it's another origin story. They say their going for something darker, but I think their idea of Dark is "How sarcastic can we make this?" Andrew Garfield is a spiderman filled with spite, and Dennis Leary is all up in this movie like a boss.
I'm glad they're also sticking to one villian, (who also happens to NOT be Green gobbels) and Gwen Stacy instead of Mary Jane, will at least have this movie feel fresh to people.
Yeah? Trailer under the cut.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012 at 1:44AM tagged Drinkin, Randy Travis, Superbowl, hidden segue 
That is a really hardcore forehead...There's a lot of things I probably could have brought up since coming back online. MIA flipped off the superbowl, The Giants won the Superbowl, PuppyBowl VIII was the real show here. Instead, we're going with something a little more important.
Celebrated Country Singer gets Arrested for Celebrating.
As quoted from Marquee: "The Denton County Sheriff's Office tells CNN that Sanger police found a vehicle parked in front of a Baptist church very early Monday morning and, upon further investigation, discovered Travis in the car with an open bottle of wine. The police say the 52-year-old singer smelled of alcohol."
Poor Randy Travis was so pumped with how awesome the Super Bowl was, he gone and celerbrated at the old church, by himself, with some wine.
It seems like such a quiet old man thing to do. Drink wine at the house of God. It's practically biblical. But like the God fearing contry that it is, Police come along and put his ass in Jail for being drunk in public (which is a bit of a downer considering where most social drinking gatherings take place). Don't they know he's Randy Travis?
Well regardless, after spending some time in the drunk tank, Travis confessed his sins, and vowed to never enjoy anything ever again.
Monday, February 6, 2012 at 9:16PM tagged Dinosaur, blast from the past, ef, time capsule, we're back 
A long time ago, this was a wonderful blog where creativity roamed. Culture was poked, and people were prodded. Then, like sand in the hour glass, it just stopped...
...and for a while, nobody bothered to turn the hour glass over.
Well obviously that time ends now, and we plan to make it end in a very big (awesome) way.
So please, join Ef on it's second journey through the internet. That's right! A second journey, for the first time.
Your friend and mine,
Jason Benedict
Saturday, July 11, 2009 at 9:47PM DBZ, the way it was meant to be seen. Well, I'll admit it didn't get funny for me till Goku arrived at Kame House, that's when it got good!
In other news, it appears the writers of EFing media are in fact, not dead. Which surprises our one reader, Mrs. Crab that lives five doors from me. Whom I find seems to be stalking me, and is in fact outside my window right now as I write this. J/K, I know we have more readers out there. Right Mom and Dad? :P
News Friday, July 10, 2009 at 6:29AM
There wasn't much coverage last time on the New Vampiric media God, Rob Pattinson, and I still don't have a whole lot to say.
Clearly, Rob Pattinson does not know what he got himself into. I imagine that he has damned himself to alife of "Lohan" syndrome, where he will be mobbed by fans and the media until he washes himself up with embarrassing youtube videos and bad photos taken during drug binges.
Just kidding. Who knows? He seems to have it together, yet, there is an unmistakeable amount of uncomortability coming from his end in interviews and an obvious issue withhis ability to explain himself. I've seen a few candid moments, one where he was nearly "eaten" by a drunk fan girl.He was even seen at Burger King. I know! Pretty deep, right? He bit Tyra Banks, and she liked it (No? really?), he's a momma's boy, he says the first thing that comes off the top of his head; even if it's a bold faced lie. He is an admitted liar, actually, and told one interviewer that he almost wanted to bite a seven year old girl when she "so desperately begged" to be bitten. Both, fishy, and creepy.
He seems pretty normal to me. It's his situation that makes him seem like a jerk, if anything.
How would you act if some asshole told you that "you" were the hottest Vampire to ever hit the big one?
His image could likely sabotage the"Twighlight" writer's hard work, assuming that the story revolves heavily around the character "Edward" and also assuming that it is written as a narrative by the character "Bella". If fansof Rob Pattinson decide he's not worth the Kleenex and ice cream,"Edward" won't be worth the spoons and snot. Unless those who see the movies first, then read, have the imaginative capacity to errase the Pattinson from the pages, the books won't be worth the buy either.
Three more movies to go! Can Rob make the miles?
So far, I haven't been able to sum Mr. A.K.A. (Edward) up into a three piece suit just yet. I'm still waiting for a straight answer from the dude and it seems to be a far cry. I suppose I must actually go and blockbust the movies. Until then, keep your knickers on your girlfriend's hoohoo and keep in touch for my conclusion on "How to be a Rob Pattinson".
Here's a little gem I found. Enjoy!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXIk696BlVg
-J.Cuttlethorn-
Thursday, July 2, 2009 at 3:45PM tagged Fail Bus, Yahoo Answers, crazy ex On Today's Fail Bus, I pick on Yahoo Answers. So be sure to hit the jump, cause I guarantee it to be a good waste of time.
I love Yahoo answers. It is the place, where the largest percent of the worst opinions can be found. While I believe there is no such thing as a stupid question, this view has waivered a little at times since the discovery of Yahoo Answers.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009 at 11:12PM tagged Billy Mays, Hero, Infomercial Legend, Pitchman No one, will forget the good work you've done sir. Out of all the celebrities to kick the bucket in this short of a time span, Billy Mays has left the biggest void in our hearts. Let us reflect, for a moment. Before going to a video.
News Sunday, June 28, 2009 at 12:48PM tagged =(, Billy Mays, Oxiclean, get tough on stains, sad day Wow, in keeping with the rule of 3's for celebrity deaths, I regret to report that Billy Mays, of OxiClean fame, was found dead this morning.
CNN has more info, here.
I want to keep this short, since our last few posts have been but celebrity deaths, so I'm just gonna post this small montage of this big, great man.
Hey, God? Looks like you'll be able to get those stains out now!
News 
